Blue mind

music for you to enjoy..it is peaceful..i like that

Parachute - She Is Love

i am love....

it is very hard for him, to decide, to stay with me...at times.

i had a job when we met and a car.

i was more broken than i had ever been before, really.

i had 6 broken ribs from being punched by a client at work..i had that bad cold everyone had last year. and every time i coughed my ribs poked me..oh, God i truly thought i was gonna die...

I thought i would die from the broken heart more than the broken ribs and cold..that my lover had left me with..

but, jim made love to me against his better judgement. when i had broken ribs

and i cried each time, like some lost child. because he was so caring...so loving.

and that truly touches me more than any thing, more than looks, a kind heart i prize most.

we have suffered horribly...

i look at him and i decide, right then, if he leaves cause he really can't take it. i am ok with that. because i will have cherished every moment that i have had with him.

i will cherish his strength, his craziness, his habit of carrying a book in his back pocket to read, that he likes to dog ear books like i do. i will cherish the way he crosses his legs. and the way he laughs... if he decides to go

I have been in wars. not in Vietnam or Korea ...but still in wars on the home front. just as bad as any battle over seas. haven't we all to a degree? had a war within us, and around us.

things that pull us apart at the seems...

but, this i know, i am a survivor...

and i hope he sees how valuable i am before he chooses...because i am love

nita

The Verve Pipe - The Freshmen

Life and All....

When I was a child. I knew it was my destiny to be a famous writer. A missionary from Africa prophesied this over me.

"Your words will reach many shores and they will change lives. You will speak to dead things and they shall come alive. You are life..Your words are life and they are powerful."

I don't see myself as poor. I see myself in a situation I know God will help me out of..Like the old man said, "There is only death for you here girl. Go home God isn't done with you yet."

When we see ourselves as poor, and have a poverty mentality, that will kill us quicker than anything.

Come on..When I see the sunrise in the morning my heart nearly beats out of my chest. I learned to appreciate my life after I was tied to a bed and tortured everyday by my 1st husband. {not John} Before him. I stayed with the 1st one from the time I was 15 till 20 years old.

When you have a bag over your head and are suffocating, you learn to appreciate each breath.

I do not feel sorry I endured that. It made me appreciate life so much more. I learned to survive in my mind, even if I was bleeding profusely while my face was punched and kicked at his whim.

I am not condoning or promoting torture. I am just saying I learned a very valuable lesson.

To enjoy each sunrise and sunset. To enjoy not being hit OR slapped when I give someone my opinion.

I learned to appreciate living.

So even though I don't have what I need right now. I will be content with what I do have. And work hard to make our lives better.

Because I can laugh, I can cry, I can have emotion without being hit for it. I can breath, I can eat, I can love.

Because really, love is the most important thing of all. That, and forgiveness, and vision for your life.

nita