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Saturday, April 19, 2008

Dad is Recovering...


This was Dad after surgery this week. I took it while he was asleep.
He has been in so much pain. I have not cried in front of him because if you do, he cries and then he chokes. . But I seem to fall apart at home. Mom said when she visited him today he cried when he turned his head too far. That made me cry... I wonder if the sadness will ever be over?
I am so very down right now. I have not wrote this week because it has been so hard to deal with all of this.
Dad will be coming home tomorrow. He will be bed ridden for 6 weeks. He will also have to be feed through a feeding tube in his stomach.
I wish John was here...
I wish above all things that he was here to talk to Dad.
To encourage him. Dad has cried so much because he misses John.
Many days it feels like my heart is going to break because I miss John so much too.
I was thinking today of all the times that I have heard Dad and John laughing together over some joke that John told..
Discussing gardening, tools and lawn mowers....
Dad bringing John something over he had picked up at a rummage sale he thought John might like.
John doing the same for him.
Them going out every single Thanksgiving and Christmas to the store to pick up things that me and Mom had forgot.
It was a tradition. And, while they were there talking to all the other men who had been sent out to pick up forgotten things.
I wish life did not have to be so painful.
All of those who have responded to sending Dad a card I will get an e-mail to you tomorrow. And thank you very much. He needs encouragement right now. If there is anyone else who wants to send cards please e-mail me . My e-mail is on my site on profile.
~Nita~
Tonight's song, Best I Ever Had, by Gary Allan
To John...

20 comments:

Jeanette said...

I am so sorry for your sadness right now, Nita. I will pray for you and your family.

Classic Charm said...

Nita,
Prayers for your dear dad and your family at this difficult time. You are strong, and John is there with you. Keep encouraging your dad Nita.
Hugs,
Rose
PS - Can you send me the address too? Email on my blog, I don't have access to e-mail for some reason, but I can check it at work.

Dena ~ swaddlecottage said...

Sweet Nita,

I wish I could be there to help in some way. I will be praying for your dad and for you.

Hugs,
Dena

Laurie said...

Praying for your Dads recovery Nita, and especially praying for you too. I
cannot imagine how hard it is right now for you and your dad to both be missing your best friend John so much at this time. Someday it is not going to hurt so much, I just wish that "someday" was today for you. I am praying for your heart to hold together Nita, and for you to get the rest you need. I encourage you to keep getting out in the spring weather and find peace in the beauty that surrounds you that God has given. May He be your strength at this time, day by day, moment by moment. I am so sorry this is all happening to you.

Love you, Laurie in Ca.

Thrifty Miss Priss said...

I'm so sorry you are so down Nita. You are really being tested right now. Try not to think about the "tomorrows" only today. Today you can be there for your mom and dad, today you can do something for yourself to give you some peace, today you can say a kind word to help your dad and your mom.
Thinking and praying for your family.
xxoo
Robin

Donna said...

Oh Sweetheart...Am doing some Mighty praying and sending healing thoughts to All of you!!! I know you've been busy so I'll just send his cards to your house. Loving you!!hughughughugs

Nonnie said...

have had you in my prayers, dear nita....and your dad.....life is so hard at times.....i enjoyed a verse in Psalms....talking about God carrying us everyday.....i pray you can let him carry you, nita....i know your heart will still ache, but the load will be shared.
hugs and prayers to you,
kimberly

Treasure Barn said...

Sorry to hear that you are so lonely Nita. I wish I could be there to help or give you a hug or something.

I will be praying for your Dad's complete speedy recovery and for your empty heart.

Thinking of you my friend
Hugs
God Bless You
Patti

serendipity said...

Keeping you in my prayers, Nita.

The Artful Eye said...

Nita,
You've got a lot on you plate right now. Remember one day at a time. You are a very strong woman.

I'm praying for your dad's recovery and there is a card in the mail, heading his way.

Keep writing to John in your journal.

Sending much love and warm wishes to you and your family.

xox Andrea

shabby chic said...

Hi Nita,
Thinking of you , I am sorry you are going through so much heartache at the moment. It must be very hard. My thoughts are with you. I hope your dad is ok too
x Dom

A bird in the hand said...

I wish I could take away some of the hurt, but in feeling it, you'll get through it. Fighting it will make it stronger; letting it wash through you will make it weaker. It might feel endless but it is not. It is not. Do what you can, but also take care of yourself, at least physically.
xox

Vickie said...

Nita, I'm sorry for the emotional and physical pain your family is going through. Try to remember when things felt different and know someday they will feel different again. It's hard when we aren't in control and it's someone else's timing not ours. I have a card on it's way to your dad! I continue to hold you and your family in my prayers.

Nonnie said...

was thinking of you as i was driving today.....about how much heartache you have had and are going through.....i pray you will have strength and courage, nita....and comfort.....keeping you and yours in my thoughts and prayers,
kimberly

~Red Tin Heart~ said...

To all who have made comments thank you from the bottom of my heart.. I have been helping my Mom take care of my Dad and I am spending alot of time over there so I have had no time to blog.
I am learning to feed him through a tube and clean the trac.
It is hard for me.
But I am learning. You do what you have to do.
If I did not have all of you leaving comments my life would be so lonley. You all help me through the day.
I promise as soon as I get some extra minutes I will be back visiting you..
love nita

Susan Ramey Cleveland said...

Nita, your family seems to be having more than its share of pain right now. Just remember that God loves you and grieves with you. I'm praying now that your dad's recovering is fast and that he's soon out of pain.
Love,
Susan

Jannie M said...

I am sorry you are having such a tough time. The only thing I have to offer is to tell you I pray for you every day and I know you will find reasons to smile again one day. God bless you. ~Jann

SweetAnnee said...

Oh Nita..I understand..but keep in mind..this life is just a pass through..
and as my grandson said
Gramma I'll love you always, even in Heaven
..no more getting sick and no more dying there.!!

love an LOTS of prayers..God be with you..
deena

http:/blogcabinfever.typepad.com said...

The card for your dad is going out today, sorry it's taken so long. I'm sorry you are going through this. You've been through a lot. The Lord knows, and nothing can touch His child without going through His loving hands first. You are Loved...
There is a song, I'm a Child Of The King
I'm a child of the King
A child of the King,
With Jesus my Savior
I'm a child of the King.

I'm hoping you know the song and it sticks in your mind today. When I was going through the valley with my John and it was so very hard, I would sing. (And now with my little sister too)... That's what the Bible says. So, sing Nita, sing.
Hugs,
Pam

becomingkate said...

Best wishes to you and for your dad! I will say a prayer. *hugs*

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I love beauty, whether it is in nature, literature or art. And I love music... My day feels incomplete if I haven't had a chance to listen to some good music.. I also love beautiful souls, and kind hearts.

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“To love means loving the unlovable. To forgive means pardoning the unpardonable. Faith means believing the unbelievable. Hope means hoping when everything seems hopeless.”
—G.K. Chesterton (1874-1936); writer, critic
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