The Redemption of Ruby Shane (part 9)

"Within sorrow is grace. When we come close to those things that breaks us down. We touch those things that also break us open, and in that breaking us open, we uncover our true Nature."

Wayne Muller
author, therapist, minister


It was a sad relief that Daddy was dead. We no longer had to be terrorized by him, but his blood was on my hands.

It is a terrible thing to live in fear. To know that the slightest action can cause you to be slapped or punched or beaten down.
And that was what it was like with him. Constant fear of being hurt or him hurting Momma.

I had a kaleidoscope when I was little and when I lifted it up to the sun showers of pink, blue, green, purple, orange and yellow lights filled my eye. It was a special present from my Grandma on Momma's side. The outside of the Kaleidoscope was made from abalone shell, and it had tiny carvings of whales and ocean animals on the sides of it.

I hid it under my bed in an old shoe box, and when things made me sad I took it and looked through it. Like when Daddy was yelling at Momma.

Funny how we think of such things at odd moments.
Daddy's blood had congealed around his head, and the Sheriff was asking us how this thing had happened. Momma was explaining quietly in the corner and he was patting her arm as she talked.

I still couldn't quit crying. No matter what, he had been my Daddy and I had killed him, even though I was protecting Momma.

The Sheriff walked up to me and looked me over and pulled out a big white handkerchief from his pocket and held it out to me.

"Go on take it, it's clean." He said gruffly.

I took it in my hands and wiped my face with it and self-consciously blew my nose.

He looked at me again and grinned, "You can keep that."

Then with seriousness he said. "Ruby, Your Momma told me what happened, and by looking at her I know she is telling the truth. I have been called out her before because of your Daddy . I know what you did was to save her from getting killed. Hell, it looks like he almost did kill her." He winced as he looked at Momma's swollen face, her whole head had swollen to the size of a basketball. And bloodstains covered the front of her torn blouse from her broken nose.

"There may be an inquest but I doubt it, we all knew your Daddy and what he was capable of. Ruby you and your Momma are free. I have an ambulance to take you all over to the hospital for your Momma to get checked out. "

"Thank you Sheriff." I took Momma's hand and led her to the ambulance. We had a chance to start over somewhere. Somewhere where no one knew us. Somewhere where they couldn't judge us by our past. Just as we were getting in the ambulance Thomas showed up. He rushed up and put his arms around me. "Ruby you are going to be alright. I am here for you and your Momma, and we are all going to be OK. I am going to follow you to the hospital." Thomas got into his truck.

And at that moment I knew my old life was behind me.

My heart would heal. Tragedy was behind me. I would no longer be haunted by sadness and despair. I would make my life a good life. And me and Momma and Thomas would look after each other.

The End

Story by Nita Barrow- Zimmerman