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Sunday, June 28, 2009



Song for day, Fix You by Coldplay

I went to the lake today, my sister and her husband came with me. I didn't want to swim, I just wanted to put my feet into the water.

It felt so good.. warm water washing over my feet and ankles like holy water.

Jamie and I stood there for about 40 minutes talking and singing..We sang the song, Cool Change..Remember that song? I was born in the sign of water it's there where I do my best....That song?


I looked out across the lake and felt so happy. Good memories flooded my mind..

I miss the water.

When I was a teenager we went to the beach almost everyday. I loved it. Some days, we would spend hours picking up driftwood on shores that were a little secluded.

Then there were days I would sit on the dam by myself and watch sail boats sailing on silver streaked waters. My heart fairly ached in my chest just watching them move across the water. I wanted to learn to sail more than anything. I felt free during those moments.

I would swim for hours. Floating on an inner tube watching the clouds and wondering what my life would be like when I was older. I would get out of the water and lay on a towel to get a break from the water. The sun drenched my body with warmth as I ran my fingers through the hot sand, writing my initials in it over and over. And then taking my hand and swashing it away.

Jamie would always have a picnic packed. She packed fresh tea, grapes, and chocolate chip cookies. She would grill hot dogs and hamburgers while me and Jeannie and Jeff swam or did whatever. Those are some of my happiest memories. Being at the water.

Life takes such twisted turns. It is good that we can't see into our future? It would fairly wreck us if we could.

Jamie said today that we need to take up the business of living. That we need to squeeze as much life into every moment that we can. I agree.

I will be honest, I have had such sorrow over losing John, and sorrow for all the other things that have happened this year, that it has been hard for me to function.

It is like the song I have below says, " When you get what you want but not what you need..."

But I know I am going to try my hardest every single day to be happy and create. I am going to love people even if I am not loved back. And I am going to seek new friendships. And I am going to aim for more good days than bad days.

Because I am patching my heart up a little piece at a time..it is time to fix me.

xoxo Nita

P.s Donna you are loved

5 comments:

Mimi said...

the water is indeed peaceful...and as you just sit or lay and listen to it lap against the shore your mind can drift in a thousand different directions...
I am so happy that you are finding peace within yourself...
{{Hugs}}
Mimi

Laurie in Ca. said...

I find peace at the water too Nita. I am thankful I live close to the ocean. It washes out the worries for a while and is so delightful. I am glad you got away and found yourself. I love you and consider you a dear friend of mine.

Love and Hugs, Laurie

Donna said...

Hahahahaaaaa....Ahhhhhkiddo!!! My heart is singing right now!!! I see you've decided to get your "toes wet" and I'm Lovin' it!!!
The Angels will hold you up when Ever you decide to take off and Fly!!
You've given me a gift...life!
I'm So proud of you!!
I love you too!
(((HUG)))

Thrifty Miss Priss said...

I remember that song Nita! So wonderful that you and your sister spent the day together...and decided it's time to live in the moment. "Happy Days are here again Nita!"
Robin

kimberly said...

love your words, nita....so important to remember to LIVE each day, each moment....to stay above the fray and petty things that drown our spirit of thankfulness.....
xoxo
kimberly

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I love beauty, whether it is in nature, literature or art. And I love music... My day feels incomplete if I haven't had a chance to listen to some good music.. I also love beautiful souls, and kind hearts.

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Pick out one person a day to encourage.

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And for the Jewish people who live there. May God give them the strength they need to defeat their enemies.
“To love means loving the unlovable. To forgive means pardoning the unpardonable. Faith means believing the unbelievable. Hope means hoping when everything seems hopeless.”
—G.K. Chesterton (1874-1936); writer, critic
"There will come
a time
when you believe
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That will be the beginning."
Louis L'Amour
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"Wisdom is knowing what to do next;
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exert from
The Philosophy of Despair
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Samuel Taylor Coleridge
~Wishes are free~
So why not make one?
Psalm 138:7

Though I am surrounded by troubles, my God will preserve me against the anger of my enemies. He will clench His fist against my angry enemies! His Power will save me. The Lord will work out His plans for my life- for His faithful love endures forever.

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