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Saturday, October 8, 2011

i am love....

it is very hard for him, to decide, to stay with me...at times.

i had a job when we met and a car.


i was more broken than i had ever been before, really.

i had 6 broken ribs from being punched by a client at work..i had that bad cold everyone had last year. and every time i coughed my ribs poked me..oh, God i truly thought i was gonna die...

I thought i would die from the broken heart more than the broken ribs and cold..that my lover had left me with..


but, jim made love to me against his better judgement. when i had broken ribs

and i cried each time, like some lost child. because he was so caring...so loving.

and that truly touches me more than any thing, more than looks, a kind heart i prize most.

we have suffered horribly...

i look at him and i decide, right then, if he leaves cause he really can't take it. i am ok with that. because i will have cherished every moment that i have had with him.


i will cherish his strength, his craziness, his habit of carrying a book in his back pocket to read, that he likes to dog ear books like i do. i will cherish the way he crosses his legs. and the way he laughs... if he decides to go

I have been in wars. not in Vietnam or Korea ...but still in wars on the home front. just as bad as any battle over seas. haven't we all to a degree? had a war within us, and around us.

things that pull us apart at the seems...

but, this i know, i am a survivor...

and i hope he sees how valuable i am before he chooses...because i am love

nita

3 comments:

Donna said...

I hope he stays too...
(((HUG)))

~Red Tin Heart~ said...

thanks Donna..it is the circumstances..more than anything..more than me cause he is crazy about me. i told him two are stronger than one. but i will be ok..i know God perfects that which concerns me

~Red Tin Heart~ said...

and i hope he stays too...i have been so lost for so long..in the lost and found that i need someone who can be strong with me...and love me enough not to leave

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I love beauty, whether it is in nature, literature or art. And I love music... My day feels incomplete if I haven't had a chance to listen to some good music.. I also love beautiful souls, and kind hearts.

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Pick out one person a day to encourage.

Please pray for the protection of Israel.
And for the Jewish people who live there. May God give them the strength they need to defeat their enemies.
“To love means loving the unlovable. To forgive means pardoning the unpardonable. Faith means believing the unbelievable. Hope means hoping when everything seems hopeless.”
—G.K. Chesterton (1874-1936); writer, critic
"There will come
a time
when you believe
everything is finished.
That will be the beginning."
Louis L'Amour
(1908-1988)

"Wisdom is knowing what to do next;
virtue is doing it."
David Star
(1851-1931)
exert from
The Philosophy of Despair
It is never too late to be who you might have been.
George Eliot
Friendship is a sheltering tree.
Samuel Taylor Coleridge
~Wishes are free~
So why not make one?
Psalm 138:7

Though I am surrounded by troubles, my God will preserve me against the anger of my enemies. He will clench His fist against my angry enemies! His Power will save me. The Lord will work out His plans for my life- for His faithful love endures forever.

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